Last night I decided to go see the new movie, Like Crazy. I’ve been having the worst few days and I really needed to just cry. You know, you need to cry so you stop feeling numb. I felt as if I was just in such a blur the last couple days, I needed to get some emotion out.
Seeing how this movie was a Indie film, it was only showing at the Royal Oak Main Art Theatre. So, I paid a co-worker to close for me, got out at 9pm, the show started at 9:30pm and I was on my way. I got to the theatre and it was every bit of a small town theatre that you could imagine. I mean, box office out front, small concession stand, no one to check tickets, and a small sitting area to discuss the movie afterwards. So I made my way to theatre 3 and there it was in front of me, the movie that was about to sum up everything I have been feeling within the past 48 hours..
In the movie, Anna was a girl from the U.K and her boyfriend, Jacob, was from Santa Monica. I mean, sure there was never anyone from another country that was involved but there were real, true feelings. As they spent more and more time apart, they started seeing other people, they just couldn’t work it out with the distance but their feelings never died. One long night and a couple drunk phone calls later, they were reunited. They were inseperable. Then, everything changed. The time they spent apart made them into different people. They were no longer a part of each others lives, they were simply just together for the sake of the memories they once shared. They ended up breaking up once more, going back to the people they were with previously, and then, as Anna got the chance to go back to the U.S, she went and lived with Jacob. They didn’t have the spark they once had. Even though they had a past, they couldn’t continue living in the memories. They had to move on.
At the end of it, I was upset with the ending because it just stopped. It just simply went to the title and that was it. Fin. But I know their story because I am living it. I have a Jacob in my life. I also have a Simon (the person who truly made Anna happy). My Jacob and I have a past. But as time went on, I realized I couldn’t be content with just living with what once was. I still converse with him from time to time but he will never make me feel the way my Simon does. The tricky thing here, Simon doesn’t understand this. I mean how could he. I’m asking him to understand something that sometimes I don’t even understand. How could you spend so long with someone, but yet at the end of the day, care SO much about someone else. Well, I guess I do understand it now, I experienced that so I could be grateful for the love that comes from my Simon. Hopefully it’s not too late now. I would give the world just to have him know that I am grateful for every moment we have spent together and I hope we can continue. Even though it won’t be easy and I would have a lot to prove, I would do everything I possibly could to make it known how happy he has made me every single day.
I’ll admit that I haven’t always been the best when it comes to expressing my feelings, I have never been the first to say exactly how I feel. I keep myself closed off, I keep things to myself. I am learning the hard way that that is a terrible trait. A fatal flaw if you will. It pushes the ones who I am closest to away. I need to work on this, and from here on out, I will.
I’ve always been told that you can love someone so much but you can never love them as much as you can miss them.. I’ve never felt that a single statement has held more truth than right now. </3 please come back, I’m begging you.
